So bad it's good, So good its brilliant, and... "Show Dogs"
It seems like Blumhouse Productions gets a bit of a worse reputation that it really deserves.
The studio may be responsible for producing a slew of schlock that ends upexemplifying the worst of the film industry’s desire to make a quick buck as cheaply as possible but when a studio presses its creators to use their money wisely to emphasize clever filmmaking over excessively produced spectacle to churn out gems like “Whiplash,” “The Gift,” and “Get Out,” that should probably be more of an indictment on the company’s talent pool than its perceived thriftiness.
Producing one point in that statement’s favor is “Upgrade,” a techno revenge thriller from the Leigh Whannell, screenwriter of the first “Saw” movie, that’s a breath of fresh air amongst a landscape of blockbuster cinema that carries itself with style without sacrificing substance on a miniscule budget.
Left quadriplegic after an attempt on the life of him and his wife leaves her dead, mechanic Grey Trace is left immobile and with little to live for until his last client, hearing of his situation, offers to restore his mobility by way of an experimental surgery, implanting an artificial intelligence between his neck and spine. Along with the installation of the AI known as Stem, Grey ostensibly gains a personal assistant within his own head, able to identify details of his wife’s murder that the cops were unable to.
Emboldened by this information, Grey sets out to avenge his wife with Stem’s assistance, trusting more and more of his free will to the machine to carry out the kills.
The savvy viewer may see the ethical issues developing within the story from a mile away but the most striking thing about “Upgrade” is just how relatable it is. The future that the film is set in is heavily based on technology that isn’t mainstream but very accessible today.
Striking a balance between making the polish of said technology feel attainable and dialogue presenting very lived in and three dimensional characters to the point where those feeling nostalgic for analogue technology don’t feel like technophobic machine demonizers as they do ordinary people with a particular preference for operating in life, Whannell manages to craft a rare breed of future in film that actually feels over the horizon within the next 30 years or so.
Adding to that atmosphere is the fine line walked between style and realism. While all of the characters may seem like types at first the actors are given a lot of room to really cut loose.
It would have been easy for Grey to come off as one note before his accident and wholly unlikeable after setting off to do his mission but Logan Marshall-Green manages to hopefully take his first steps into stepping out of the shadow of being that guy that looks like Tom Hardy. Grey is a charming, sincere, and hardworking man that is making do with the terrible hand he’s been dealt and the degree to which he is horrifically aware of just how far in over his head he is manages to be perfectly emphasized by his relationship with Stem.
The two serve as a comedic duo of sorts, Stem operating Grey’s body with an almost unnatural robotic looking coordination to protect the life of its host who watches and reacts with utter horror at the effortlessly executed carnage that his body carries out.
“Upgrade” is peppered with these moments of dark comedy that keep the wild nature of the story grounded in a level of humanity that feels less like a precautionary tale on the dangers of technology and more refreshingly like a reminder that the only real danger to mankind’s evolution is mankind itself.
It’s not a movie that is devoid of indulging just a little bit too much into its style on occasion but “Upgrade” manages to keep all of its spectacle and science fiction elements focused squarely on the development of its own strongly crafted plot, the only real flaw of which is unfortunately its ending.
While not necessarily bad and absolutely admirable in its multiple subversions of several clichés that it had appeared to be fully ready to cash in on, the final twist of the movie lacks a lot of the subtle cleverness imbedded throughout the rest of the film. I hesitate to call it a copout but it is noticeably more conventional than the rest of the movie, which seemed to be almost unpredictable.
Even with those few narrative hiccups rearing their head however, “Upgrade” is a true testament to what clever filmmaking and smart resource management can accomplish in a day and age where Hollywood doesn’t seem to grasp why $100 million franchise entries released weekly bomb when audiences constantly demand something new and authentic.
If should be seen by audiences and wannabe directors alike as living proof that a fun and intelligent blockbuster can be made successfully and on the cheap.
8 Mental Firmware Updates out of 10
Following the example of 2016’s “Nine Lives,” “Show Dogs” continues efforts to revive god awful live action kids movies with talking animals after the turn of the last decade seemed to sterilize the cinematic landscape of its infection once and for all.
Ludacris plays a police dog that is allowed to work human cases for some reason alongside FBI agent Will Arnett. The two have to put aside their differences to save a horrendously CGI panda cub from animal traffickers.
“Show Dogs’” only aspect of any substantial noteworthiness is just how behind the times it feels in the absolute worst way possible, from the irritating generic backing track that qualifies as a musical score, to the notion of casting B grade celebrities as talking dogs with matching aesthetics to their own personality stylings.
The only thing that keeps it from being a masterpiece of ironic viewing is that unlike “Nine Lives,” it doesn’t really stand apart from the mold that it’s mimicking in any particularly fascinating way. That movie contained actors that were actually trying, opened up on a hilariously bad green screen effect juxtaposed with a dead serious Kevin Spacey monologue that would have been at home on “House of Cards,” and of course, Christopher Walken.
In fact, the movie has probably gained an even more mesmerizing note of karmic significance given that “Nine Lives” may have been the last high profile role Kevin Spacey took before his true nature dismantled everything that he’s built.
“Show Dogs” is bland at absolute best but overall, loud, crass, and excruciating at worst. The closest it comes to standing out is the subtexts of sexual abuse with which the dog show circuit is portrayed, which could have been nervously humorous if only for how out of place it is in a kid’s movie, but is ultimately undone by how uncomfortable it and the feature surrounding it are to watch.
I was braced for badness within the first five minutes, irritated within the first 20, ready for it to end within the first half hour, ready to walk out after 45 minutes, and mentally checked out by the hour mark, ready to sprint for the exit at the fade to black rather than the first line of the credits themselves.
If you want take your kids out to watch something, between Studio Ghibli Fest and local theater holding specialty screenings for kids movies as summer events, you have better options to tide the kids over until “The Incredibles 2” hits. If you’re after ironic viewing, stay at home and fire up something on Netflix or Amazon Prime.
Leave this thing to die in the decade that it should have stayed in for god’s sake.
1 Voluntary Veterinary Euthanization out of 10
Let’s be honest, you already know whether or not you’re going to see this movie or already have seen it.
If you know that “Best F(r)iends” exists, if you’re willing to read a review about it, if even know who Tommy Wiseau is, 99% chance your mind is already made up about this movie.
Part 2 of the great Wiseau’s sophomore cinematic outing falls right in line with the man’s current career of fascinating ironic viewing and if you go in for that, you will get what you’re after one way or another.
Strictly from a filmmaking perspective however the entire project does suffer from very apparent bloat with the release of Part 2. Wiseau’s absence as a result of the quite literal cliffhanger ending from part 1 leaves the movie to be carried by Greg Sestero, the supporting cast, and its own weird editing quirks. Although Sestero shows promise as a character actor, he defintley struggles to carry the movie on his own, showing that he may need Wiseau’s bizarre presence just as much as Wiseau requires him as a straight man anchor.
The unfolding thriller consisting of half heist, half road trip movie is rather dull and plodding and while the supporting cast really gives it their all, the movie feels like it could have easily been trimmed down and reedited into a trimmed down version of the Part 1 for a better balanced and superior product.
I was almost ready to write the film off as a full fledged dud until the absolutely brilliant third act kicks in.
“Best F(r)iends” Part 2’s final 35 minutes or so not only brings Wiseau and his mortician character back into the fold at center stage but executes a gloriously trashy shift in content and tone that satisfyingly pays off the rest of the movies build up while revealing a twist so brilliantly executed and well layered that in the way that it connects the entire plot and themes of trust and redemption as related to friendship that the movie almost transcends the so bad it’s good territory into actually being kind of flat out beautiful.
The biggest surprise about “Best F(r)iends” is that with another rewrite or two, tighter editing, and a week’s worth of connective reshoots, it actually could have been a legitimately good movie.
As it is, the choppily edited and poorly paced laughing stock of melodrama and murder is fun enough if you know what you’re getting into but overall, you’re probably better off waiting for the whole thing to land on DVD and having a blast with your friends on a couch over a beer or two.
4 out of 10 for posterity’s sake but let’s face it, you know whether or not this is for you.
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