Fromage Fridays #23: WolfCop

I'm starting to sense a discouraging pattern regarding wolf movies.

Lazy, drunken, irresponsible and non-charismatic police detective Lou Garou is a werewolf. Get it? Get it? Because his name is Lou Garou? Are you laughing?

Hope you get a kick out of that fact because it’s about the only trick this lazy old dog knows.

Similarly to “Rubber,” which I took a look at several months ago, “WolfCop” essentially believes that the absurdity of its premise is enough to carry it out to feature length, thus putting little effort into anything else.

Watching this film’s squandering of its own imaginative potential through its lack of writing and underacting only brought to mind b-movie classic, “The Toxic Avenger,” which was another pseudo-superhero crime b-movie.

The difference between “WolfCop” and “The Toxic Avenger?” “The Toxic Avenger” actually had energy. “The Toxic Avenger” utilized a funky 80s sound track and over the top performances to drive its cartoonish dialogue  forward, along with writing actual jokes with set ups and punch lines, however dark they may have been. “WolfCop” does none of these things.

 I won’t claim to have seen Leo Fafard act before but if this film is any indication of what he’s capable of, I hope to never see him again. I get that his character is supposed to be a cynical drunk but his lack of screen presence or memorable dialogue prevents him from creating any sort of character period, much less a memorable one to root for. The guy’s bodily fluids give a better performance than he does, as the movie is disturbingly apt to remind its audience every 10 minutes with a scene of him spitting, vomiting, or pissing graphically.

Unfortunately, the alternative is no better.

Failing as a comedy, the film could have taken the grindhouse route and created a cop movie so over the top with a straight face that you can’t help but laugh at how ludicrous it is, yet it even fails at that because the half-assed comedy undercuts any equally half-assed efforts to be dramatic or atmospheric in support of its element of horror.

What you’re ultimately left with is a cop movie without a fascinating mystery, a horror movie with no atmosphere and a comedy that isn’t funny. It even commits the ultimate sin of werewolf cinema by having an underwhelming transformation sequence. I can forgive the low budget appearance of the titular character in question but if you were going to even bother showing the transformation, I’d expect something more imaginative today than a lazy cross between “The Howling” and “Trick r’ Treat.”

“WolfCop” is quite possibly one of the most disappointing films that I have ever come across. So much potential goes to waste in order to disrespect the very type of movie that it’s attempting to capitalize on and the only emotion overriding my disappointment in the film’s quality is the irritation that they had the gall to advertise a “WolfCop 2” in the credits.

There is a grand total of perhaps 15 minutes in the second half in which the film actualizes on the potential of its concept and they just aren't worth sitting through the rest of the film for. Save your time and just watch the highlights in the trailer.

No Shatners

Bottom Line: The only thing saving "WolfCop" from Crit. Hit's second Nega Shat is mercifully short length and its squandering of its own premise rather than destroying a legacy like last week's film.